Monday, January 26, 2009

till death do us part

(just some cute little wedding day couple. nobody i know.)

I found out today that my aunt and uncle are getting divorced. I'm not all that close with them because they live in the Midwest and we only see each other every few years, but I'm pretty close with their daughter. It's a story I've heard too many times - we grew apart after the kids left, we don't have that much in common anymore, we want different things in life.

I am surprised, and yet I'm not. I never knew them to have any problems, they always seemed to get along well, complement each other's personalities, etc. Based on all my interactions with them, I wouldn't say there were any signs that they were headed for divorce, so in that sense I would say I am surprised by this.

But I am also not surprised. How can two people stay together for a lifetime without Christ? A friend recently reminded me that every relationship is a sinner meeting a sinner. It's by God's grace alone that we are able to enjoy any good and healthy relationship with one another. If a marriage is held together only by mutual attraction, affection, and shared interests, do we really expect it to last a lifetime? Some get lucky this way, but most don't.

Marriage is a calling. Loving your husband or wife is a daily choice to act in obedience to God. Doesn't sound romantic, I know. And yet knowing that my husband loves God and that he wants to be obedient to God by loving and serving his wife according to God's word... that may not be romantic necessarily, but it is certainly attractive and endearing to me! And it does not depend on us continuing to like the same stuff, or even see the world the same way (though I hope we do). It depends on God's grace to us, the grace we depend on daily to live in obedience to Him. I'm not worried that one day Jon will wake up and realize we have nothing in common and therefore our marriage is over. Because our most significant promises were not made to each other, but to God; our marriage does not depend on our own faithfulness but on God's.

For great is his love toward us, and the faithfulness of the LORD endures forever. Praise the LORD. Psalm 117:2


Phil said...

I hoped the "obedience to God" link would be a poster for the Fireproof movie again.

But seriously, what you said is awesome.

Haley Ballast said...

ahahaha that would have been pretty funny! but i wouldn't want to risk some people thinking i was serious. :)

The Hyde Family said...

I am sorry about your aunt and uncle. I completely agree with you Haley. I believe that a successful marriage is between husband, wife, and God. It is a daily choice to love your spouse. If both partners always have an anxious concern for the others person's needs, then the the rest is more likely to fall into place. Don't get me wrong, Scott and I by no means have a perfect marriage. We both have to work really hard at it. I know that if God was not part of our marriage we would have probably been divorced by now. The reason Scott and and I got married in the temple was because we believe that a marriage can be eternal, if we keep the covenants we made with God. Anyway, a didn't mean to ramble on, I just have strong feelings on this. I always enjoy reading your posts on spiritual matters. It's hard to leave a comment when there is so many interesting things to talk about!